Someone told me that after their father died, their life was divided into “before my father died” and “after my father died.” For me, in this moment, my father’s death is in the center and my life is moving around that. I find myself at an in-between place; there is much to feel and experience everyday. It is vulnerable, uncharted territory. It has left me with fewer words. Though the words are coming slowly, the gratitude and love in my heart is flowing freely. I have been deeply touched by the outpouring of love and support from this amazing community – from you.
Being present for my father in his last days was a gift in my life. As I moved through the deep waves of emotion, I felt challenged on many levels. To be present and centered through this experience was only possible through the support of the community. There were many cards, flowers, smiles, and hugs. I received countless messages sent through e-mail, text and phone; words spoken at exactly the right moment. I felt, and continue to feel, enveloped by love through the experience. As I reflected on that support, these words arose – connection, service, love.
I have a new understanding of connection, of things being one, of the universe within us. There is no separation, no need for touch, or even eyes to meet. You can take a breath, feel it in your being, sense the light that vibrates through you. I felt that light touch other rays, intensify, enliven, vibrate, and illuminate his death, me, you.
There is an innate desire to see beyond your limited self, it arises naturally through that connection. As we see into this infinite vision, as I saw this infinite vision, compassion spreads and our natural response is to see how we can be of service to our fellow man, to the earth that supports us. I felt, in a new way, deeper than ever, the more we look beyond ourselves the wider our heart expands, the deeper our connection to each other, deeper our connection to the universe - within and without.
As our hearts expand we feel love. We know love. A love beyond expectations. A love fully encompassing unity. A love pure and infinite. A love that supports and carries, embraces, widens – and is the truth that connects us all. A love that is us.
With deep, deep gratitude . . .